I love it when something new leaps off the page of God’s Word and wraps itself around my heart. No matter how many times I read a passage, there is more of Him. I had one of those moments a few days ago when I read, the LORD God [was] walking about in the garden.
GOD, the Holy Creator of all things, was just casually strolling through the Garden of Eden. He was right there, with Adam and Eve without threat or harm. Until Adam and Eve ate the apple, there was absolutely nothing physically separating them from their God. Elohim was physically with the very man and woman He created. Mercy! That by itself makes my heart stand still.
So why wasn’t God enough? Why did Adam and Eve need more? Why wasn’t it enough to have the One who created them, right in front of them, with them, tangible in their presence?
That’s the question that has been running through my soul at the beginning of this year... “Why isn’t God enough?”
I’ve heard and I’ve said, “It would be so much easier if I could just see Him. If He would were right in front of me.”
Would it? Would it make a difference if JESUS, in flesh and blood, was physically standing right in front of you? If you could hold His hand? Feel His arms around you?
He was with the disciples, right in front of them, teaching them, feeding them, discipling them...and still, He wasn’t enough. They wanted the Kingdom; they wanted the seat to His right; they wanted lunch; they wanted to be the most valuable, the first...they wanted more.
My heart is breaking as I confess the hard, cold truth that JESUS, my Savior, really isn’t enough. Oh, I say He is. I so desperately want Him to be. I absolutely, completely mean for Him to be. I really believe I mean it when I say, “LORD you are enough”, but is He really?
When I’m eating food and I’ve had enough, I put the food down. I don’t even think of taking another bite, because I’m full, I’m satisfied. I don’t even want another bite of food, no matter how mouth-watering good it is - I have honestly had enough. When I have had enough, I put down the food, wipe away any crumbs, clean up whatever I’m eating and I rest.
Can you imagine if my great God was truly enough?! Lord, if You were truly enough for me, then I would be able to put down any worries I have. I would be able to put down my insecurities. I would put down my addictive behaviors, my idols, my need to control and fix and do...I would be able to put it all down. Then I would wipe away any doubts and fears that were left over, any nagging thoughts I allow the enemy to plant in my mind, I would clean up my attitude and sit down to rest - in You.
If only You were enough.
HOLY ONE OF ISRAEL - I NEED YOU TO BE ENOUGH! I WANT YOU TO BE ENOUGH!
Forgive me for the times I turn my eyes from You, wanting something else in Your place, whatever that is. You, all by Yourself are enough, You are more than sufficient, and somehow, someway, I am going to let You fill every empty space that is left in my soul and let You be enough. I am so grateful I was enough for You to leave glory and die on a cross. I am so thankful You love me to no end.