No wander then, as I was coming into consciousness the next morning, I heard, “So you think you are going to help all these people heal? WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?”
Instinctively, I said in my heart, “I AM HIS! I am covered in the blood of the Lamb! I am a child of the King of kings and the Lord of lords - THAT'S WHO I AM!” By the end of the sentence I was wide awake and a little breathless. Mostly, when I wake up in the mornings, I get to hear a song in my heart from heaven, or a word God is whispering to my heart. It wasn't always like that, but I can't remember the last time I woke up to such awful hate.
I am so thankful I am of God, and have overcome them, because He that is in me is greater than he that is in this world (I John 4:4). I am so thankful that I didn’t tremble in fear. I am so thankful that, more than I even realize, deep inside, He is guarding me at every turn and that I know, without a shadow of a doubt, I belong to Jesus Christ of Nazareth!
There has been some tough stuff that happened in the lives of the people in this GriefShare class, but the participants are there, and they are willing, and that is all God needs - a willing heart. Along with this incredible privilege to sit on the front row and watch God heal these precious souls, I am also entering into a great, big vision God has planted in my heart over the last several years to help even more people (more on that at another time).
I have become consumed with helping God's people find their way to the Creator of the universe because He is waiting on the edge of His seat to heal hearts that are broken, grief-stricken, confused, torn-apart, depressed, full of anger and rage - whatever condition your heart is in - God Almighty is ready, willing and ABLE to heal you and be in an intimate relationship with you.
I know this for certain because that’s what He did for me. Although I still have the toughest of days, I have been so thoroughly healed I would do a hundred cartwheels if I knew how! When I think about it too long, I just swell up with tears of praise and adoration for the One who loves my soul. Two years ago I would have told you, "Yea, I'll be okay again one day." But never could I have dreamed of deeply feeling joy again - NEVER!
I was listening to Beth Moore teach on being plucked out of the net. The verse she read was, “My eyes are ever toward the LORD, for He shall pluck my feet out of the net" (Psalm 25:15). That gives me a picture in my mind of being entangled.
What are you entangled in? Shame, fear, guilt, anger, rage, unforgiveness, bitterness, grief, sadness, sin...
I guess after having been entangled myself in pretty much all of that and more, having all but moved in with satan because I had been so broken and was in such deep, dark depression, I thought I was losing my mind - THEN, being plucked out by the hand of God, not because of who I am, but because of who He is, because I belonged to Him - I guess that was the reason I could respond with such surety, even while half asleep...
I AM HIS! I AM COVERED IN THE BLOOD OF THE LAMB! I AM A CHILD OF THE KING OF KINGS AND THE LORD OF LORDS!
Don’t give up! Ever!