Well, it didn’t take but a few months for GOD to show me how FREE I AM! I didn’t need to wear myself out, fighting to get free from an idolatrous heart, or negative self-talk and thinking, or the food addiction that plagues me. Leaping off the page and slapping me hard in the face for clarity were the words of John,
“SO IF THE SON SETS YOU FREE,
YOU ARE FREE INDEED!” (8:36).
I of course have read that verse way too many times to count, but as those of you know who go through your Bible daily, the same words read over and over again will grab your soul when it’s the right time. So now that my mind was reawakened to the fact that GOD ALMIGHTY had set me free through the blood of His Son, my Savior, Jesus, I prayed daily for it to hit my heart in a way that would settle it once and for all. Between that and "The Incomparable Christ" teaching series we went through at Hope Church (which you desperately need to listen to), I came to that place of realizing I don't have to get free, I AM FREE!
On that journey, and through those prayers, I ran into insecurities I thought were squashed at least a decade or two ago (awkward to say, "a decade ago or two...", geez I'm getting up there - Eeek! LOL); I ran into eye opening truths I thought I already knew; hurdles I thought I leaped over and ran far away from; spiritual attacks I could not have anticipated...you name it, it came my way in 2013. So much so, all I did was turn to what I always turn to for protection, comfort, safety - food. Breaks my heart to admit, that once again, after all we've been through together, my HOLY GOD was not enough for me. I so desperately want Him to be. I will daily seek for Him to be everything in my life. To simply be enough to calm me, comfort me, heal me, love me and hold me! And yet, whether I get it or not...
HE IS ENOUGH and I AM FREE!
THANK GOD He is GOD and will do what He sets out to do, in spite of us! In all that time of the enemy trying to drag me back to the dark, GOD gave me the greatest invitation into His great work through the LIFE Center. A dream, a vision, an explosion He placed in my heart 10 years ago, without me realizing that’s what it was. God planted in my heart the need for a safe place for His people to come and unravel without judgement or criticism. A place to HEAL from life’s hurts, DISCOVER a fresh relationship in Jesus and then freely, without shackles, THRIVE as a Jesus Follower, wherever He leads.
If that wasn’t enough, 2013 marked the 10th year anniversary of our 2nd child, Joshua, born too early at 15 weeks, and I was able to launch a new social media platform, Faith Made Genuine, to PRAISE HIS HOLY NAME! At the end of the day, GOD ALMIGHTY is all about creating a genuine faith in the hearts of His people and I have learned He will do whatever it takes. I’m more than thankful for all of my life now.
Each year, rather than a ‘resolution’, I ask GOD for a focus. It started in 2010 when GOD whispered to my soul, “I will put breath back into you and you will live again” (Ezekial 37:5). That year, after nearly 10 years of dark times, I focused on learning how to LIVE AGAIN. Jesus did raise this dead soul from the grave and I thank GOD for His life in me! 2011 it was LIVE BIG (for Christ); 2012 - LIVE FOCUSED and 2013 - LIVE FREE!
So how NOW shall I LIVE in 2014? I started asking that question, as I always do, a few months back and all He kept bringing me back to was a passage of scripture I heard at a leadership conference I attended in the summer - “Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid, and do not be dismayed, for the LORD your GOD is with you wherever you go!” (Joshua 1:9) BLESS HIS HOLY NAME!
After living a year of insecurities in light of the great things He has done and continues doing, not me, but Him, in 2014 I shall LIVE COURAGEOUS!
There is nothing I have to fear! Not man. Not my own fears. Not my inabilities or inadequacies. Not standards set by the world or other people. Not what others may think. GOD has got this! He has my back and meets me at every turn with a Kiss from Heaven! He will give me the strength I need to do what He has planned to do and all I need to do is say YES!
I can LIVE a COURAGEOUS life in Him
because HE IS ENOUGH!
I SEE RESURRECTED PEOPLE!